Didn't Realize

I didn't realize I was holding my breath till I started breathing again

This thought suddenly came to mind yesterday when I walked pass a bunch of people
I just get nervous and uncomfortable when the attention is on me
I don't like it when people stare at me, even if it's meant to flatter
I'm just really self-conscious like that... lol
I got alot of stares yesterday and I have no idea why
And when I turned to look, I even locked eyes with them
It was kinda unnerving and embarassing

My fingernails are getting long and it's bugging me
I sometimes scratch and poke myself... oww
I never did like long nails but decided to keep it just coz I wanted to see how long I can stand it
And now, I think the time has come to cut it
It's pissing me off, I can't do thing properly with these nails
Had trouble putting in my contacts and taking it out
I can't type properly, made alot of typos
I can't shampoo my hair properly... lol
I have to be extra careful and gentle with the baby, in case I scratch her
I try to refrain from touching things so my nails won't get dirty
And I'm always in fear of breaking a nail or something
I also kept looking at my nails like a narcissist, they're long and pretty
But I've decided to cut it argh!!!
I can't stand it anymore...

I never realized you were unhappy till I saw you happy

That was a line from a fic... my heart... it bleeds T__T

Edit: Because I have nothing else to do and I want something to remember by before I cut it